NEVER ORDER THE SPECIAL

Behind the counter of the Silver Woods Pro Shop, one can hear all. It was no more than 20 hours ago that I myself was in this location. While there, monitoring the chatter of the 19th hole, my ears picked up a juicy piece of information. The daily special was to be hamburger. The reason: because the frozen patties were about to go bad. This leads me to believe that all specials consist of spoiled meat on the verge of giving us all swine flu. I don't know about you guys, but I DO NOT want swine flu! Therefore I will be boycotting the 19th hole food specials and their top-dollar menu in general. $6 for a hot dog?! They're kidding, right? Oh, and I think I'll bring my own beer when we play, too.